As if planning for an entire wedding isn’t enough, there are many pre-wedding events to plan as well! The bachelor and bachelorette parties are the bride and grooms chance to have one last hurrah with their friends before they become a married couple. No, having a bachelor(ette) party does not always mean strippers and copious amounts of booze. Let’s get into the actual meaning of these parties and the possibilities they hold.
What are bachelor and bachelorette parties?
The term bachelor means “an unmarried man” while the term bachelorette means “a young unmarried woman”. Bachelor(ette) parties were in turn created to celebrate these unmarried men and woman the night before they were to be married. The very first first known bachelor party goes all the way back to 5 B.C. to ancient Sparta. The tradition was to hold a feast to honor a groom the night before his wedding. Women didn’t adopt this tradition until nearly two millennia later. While bridal showers were created in 16th century Europe, it wasn’t until the Women’s Liberation Movement in the 60’s that the “bachelorette party” was born. Women wanted to celebrate just as the men did and really wanted a time and place where they could let loose and have some fun! They also wanted a place to open more risqué gifts like lingerie without their great aunt looking down on them. I don’t blame us at all!!!
When to hold bachelor and bachelorette parties?
Traditionally, these events were held the night before the wedding to spend the night before your marriage celebrating. It was originally known as a “stag night” for men and a “hens party” for women. Often times the bachelor(ette) parties ended in disaster and the next morning began the exact same way. First off, everyone usually woke up hungover and yes that would include the bride and groom. Secondly, there was always some drunken disaster that happened and created havoc for the next day whether that be a shaved head or a broken toe. This is why things have changed in the present day.
Nowadays, it is more common to celebrate these events anywhere from 1-3 months before the wedding. That way, if anybody is hungover, shaved their head, or break a toe, then there is time to fix the issue and not have it ruin your wedding day.
Who is a part of the bachelor and bachelorette parties?
Generally, the bride and groom are too busy planning the rehearsal and wedding to even think about planning the bachelor(ette) parties. Often times, the bridal party, especially the Best Man and Maid of Honor, will plan the entire thing! That way it is one less thing that the couple getting married has to think about. This entire event should be friend focused. The family does not necessarily need to go to the bachelor(ette) parties unless you truly want them there. This is a time for the bride and groom to let loose with their friends and relax without the wandering eyes of their families.
Bachelor and bachelorette party ideas!
First off, ALWAYS ASK THE BRIDE OR GROOM WHAT THEIR IDEAL BACHELOR(ETTE) PARTY INCLUDES! Do not just assume you know what they will want. Even if they are usually the life of the party, they might just want a quaint night in.
Now there a few different types of bachelor(ette) parties to choose from. Do you want to travel to a different destination to have fun, do you want to go around your town locally and get wild and rowdy, or do you want a quaint and quiet party just to hang out with your friends? Once you decide this, then the planning can commence!
Traveling to a different destination:
When planning to travel for the bachelor(ette) party, there are a few things to take into consideration: do you want a party city, do you want a calm country town where you can rent a house and party, or would something like going wine tasting interest you? As soon as you figure out where you want to go, then the real planning begins. Who will you invite? Will it be friends and family, just friends, or just the bridal party? Where will you all be staying? What activities will be taking place? How much will it cost? Can everybody afford to go? These are all important questions so that the planner can give all other people attending a warning about everything.
Ideas: Vegas, Napa, Reno, Tahoe, Atlantic City, Vermont
Staying put and getting wild & rowdy:
When planning to stay in town, these are a few things to take into consideration: what is there to do in that town, who will be able to make it, and will you all be staying somewhere together at the end of the night or going back to your own houses? If you want to plan something in your town or city so that you don’t have to spend too much on travel expenses, make sure that there is actually fun stuff planned because otherwise it will make for a boring evening. Also, make sure out of towners have a place to stay at the very least.
Ideas: Bar hopping, Restaurant, Club, House Rental with Stripper
Quaint and quiet night in:
When planning a quaint and quiet night in, here is what to take into consideration: what activities will transpire, where will you get food/drinks, and where will this quaint evening take place? Will you rent a house or will you di it at your place? Do you want to bring in entertainment or will you create the entertainment yourself? A quaint night in can include traveling or not, what will you decide? Be sure to give everyone enough notice to make arrangements.
Ideas: Rent a House, Get a Hotel Suite, Use Someone’s House, Hire a Masseuse, Bring Games
Should you do a joint bachelor & bachelorette party?
If you decide to join up and host a joint bachelor and bachelorette party, all you have to do is plan a huge party! Often times when people opt to do a joint party when the couple shares a lot of close friends. This way, the couple can spend their party with exactly who they want and don’t have to worry about excluding anybody or feeling uncomfortable. Some ideas for a joint party include: a backyard bbq, a houseboat, game night, enjoy separate activities and then join up at a bar, or rent a house for everyone.
Whatever you decide to do, be sure to make the party about the bride and groom! It is their day after all, so do not decide for them what they would want. Instead, talk to them and see what they want their party to be about. No matter what they decide, do not try to talk them into something else. Create a fun party based on their choice. If they want a crazy night out, then plan a wild and rowdy night. If they want a quaint evening in, plan some fun at home activities to create a fun atmosphere while still respecting their wishes.
Happy Planning!
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